With family festivities and my official birthday behind me, I came home to Pittsburgh a changed woman... well, at least, an older woman. At the ripe age of 28, I was ready for a week of post-birthday partying. To start things off early in the week, Mystery picked me up (you knew that was coming, didn't you?) one rainy evening for dinner at Kaya. I've been meaning to try Kaya for some time now, and so when Mystery suggested it for a birthday dinner, I was anxious to give it a go. The ambiance was warm and festive and a corner table was a welcome hideaway, though being an early weekday evening, the restaurant was by no means crowded.

Inside Kaya

On Mystery's recommendation, we got a carafe of red sangria. It was light, refreshing, and not too sweet, served in tall, elegant wine glasses. We decided to do tapas so to get a wider selection of Kaya's offerings. To start out, we ordered the hot black bean dip which came with spiced sweet potato chips. I like just about anything that includes black beans and/or sweet potatoes, but both? It was a yummy combination, and the bean dip was true to its name, that is, unabashedly spicy. Our tapas selections that evening included the scallops, the salmon and crab cakes and a vegtable medley with chorizo sausage and shiitake mushrooms. The scallops were perhaps the most amazing scallops I have ever eaten. Spiced and braised brown on both sides, these huge sea scallops were perfectly done, so tender and silky that they sliced like a steak. No joke. The salmon and crab cakes were nothing to complain about, but I was expecting something more phenomenally delicious... being salmon and crab, after all. But they were just of average tastiness. The sausage and mushroom medley was quite good itself, though the sausage was a little hard for my taste. The shiitake mushrooms were the highlight of the dish, tender and subtle, I wouldn't have complained about a more shiitake-dominant medley.

Sabrina and Ted at Kelly's

Later in the week, Friday, it was out on the town yet again, this time to Kelly's in East Liberty for cocktails and their infamous macaroni n' cheese. Sabrina and I showed up early for a round of cosmos (Friday is Kelly's $4 cosmo special) and girl talk. The cosmos at Kelly's, I'm happy to report, are excellent. The problem with cosmopolitans is that a lot of bars treat them like a mixed drink, rather than a martini-strength drink. Cosmos are supposed to be mostly vodka with just a dash each of triple sec, lime juice and cranberry juice, but a lot of bars go way too heavy on the juices. Not so, at Kelly's. The cosmos came in their own individual cocktail shakers, which the waitress poured at our table. They were pale pink and appropriately tart. We were soon joined by Ted and Mystery, whereupon we placed our orders for the notorious Kelly's macaroni and cheese. The Kelly's mac n' cheese turns out to be everything one could imagine, complete with breadcrumbs and bubbly cheese on top. And while this baked concoction is full of rich velvety cheese, the skill of this dish is that the macaroni isn't too squishy (which is the danger of over-baking pasta; cheese is harder to over-bake). I was glad I elected the small size of macaroni and cheese because it turned out to be just enough, satisfying but not overly filling.

Krobar

After finishing our macaroni and cheese, we continued on to Krobar, a new-ish Top 40 dance club in the Strip. The crowd was a little thin upon first arrival, but we got there early enough to be waved in with no cover charge, and given the priviledge of free drinks. That's right, free drinks. From 9-11pm, Krobar offers well drinks free of charge. Now, we quickly found out that these free drinks were pretty light on the booze, but still... who can really complain about free drinks? The crowd gathered slowly, and the dance floor was slow to get busy. The DJ played, disappointingly, several awesome dance songs early on before the floor was appropriately hoppin'. It should be noted at this juncture that there are actually two dance floors at Krobar, the regular dance floor and the VIP dance floor.

Watch out! Domenico is after the ladies of Krobar!

We ventured first to the VIP dance floor, as it seemed more crowded. We soon realized that it was indeed crowded... with women. As it turned out, that night, MTV was having a casting call for a new dating reality show, and so Pittsburgh gals where there in full force to audition for TV's newest twist on The Bachelor. Luckily it was only a matter of time before both dance floors were busy and we finally hit the floor to Timbaland's "The Way I Are." All in all, the dancing was great, though some peculiarities did become apparent. First, the DJ was playing the radio edit versions of every song that normally has explicit lyrics. What's up with that? We're at an over-21 club, who's getting offended? Also, on the sometimes plus- sometimes minus-side, the DJ played a greater variety of music than just hip hop, tossing in some international club fare here and there. Sometimes this was good... it's fun to hear Darude's Sandstorm actually played at a club, but in some cases the DJ's choice of music cleared the floor (apparently Krobar regulars aren't fans of Daft Punk),

Sabrina and Ted bring sexy back at Krobar

and being a relatively small dance floor it didn't take too many dissenters to empty it out. For the most part, fun club, good specials, highly-dancable music selection... I will most certainly go back.

And so, I went home from Krobar bolstered by belated birthday fun... but wait! After one particularly lazy Saturday, I found myself back out on the town for birthday celebration. Only, it wasn't my birthday this time. Here I went and celebrated my birthday for so long, I nearly ran into Neilbert's birthday!

While Neilbert's birthday does not tend to occur in or around any particular holiday, he does have the strange fortune for his birthday to fall the day before his mother's birthday. This typically means that Neilbert is in Salamanca the weekend of his birthday, and this year was no exception. So, to celebrate among the immediate family, Saundra took the three of us out to dinner Sunday night at Eleven in the Strip (suspiciously close to but markedly unlike Krobar).

Eleven

Eleven is the rare sort of Pittsburgh restaurant where you can find haute cuisine and uber-chic dining. Neilbert and Saundra had been there once before, but that Sunday was my first time. Eleven, I must say, is the sort of restaurant that makes me feel better (though, by no means good) about the fact that Laforet is now defunct. Unlike Laforet, Eleven swings toward a marriage of traditional and contemporary cuisine. For my first course I ordered the house specialty arugula salad which comes with... get this, Lamb Bacon. Yes, folks, at Eleven they use clever cuts of lamb for the express purpose of making lamb bacon. It was heavenly... but I'm just one of those crazy people who loves lamb and loves bacon... For the main course I had duck, which couldn't have been tastier. A generous serving of duck breast left a little rare in the middle, served with an amazing concoction of broccoli and nuts. Very late autumn, very yummy. Eleven, watch out, I'm coming back some day for the tasting menu!

Me, Neilbert and Star Trek Season 7

From there it was home to the abode of Neilbert and Saundra for the opening of gifts. This was a particularly momentous occasion because it represented the end of an era. On that fateful Sunday night I gave to Neilbert... drum roll please... Season 7 of Star Trek: TNG. The last season of TNG on DVD is now in Neilbert's possession, which means we will move seamlessly as usual from Season 6 to the end of the series, and come next Father's Day Neilbert will be getting... Voyager Season 1? Cringe. This means of course I have to watch Voyager. Not just watch it, but buy it too. Hmm... well, I guess time will tell. I suppose I should be fair and give Voyager a fighting chance. But no Picard? No Data? No Giordi? And in return we get Seven of Nine? Hmm... crafty, crafty Neilbert...

Check out more pictures of our birthday celebrations in my Facebook album.

There comes a time of year when the last leaves fall from bare branches and bite of winter chill sharpens, when stressed-out college students get a long-awaited respite before the crush of finals and

Me, Neilbert and the birthday ice cream cake I made.

when families gather around the table to celebrate togetherness and family values (but not the Republican kind).

This is the time of year when my birthday happens to fall, which can sometimes really suck because... truly, can anyone think of a worse party holiday than Thanksgiving? And my birthday nearly always falls—nine times out of ten—sometime Thanksgiving week, which has historically meant one of two things. My birthday is either A) the due date of a semi-midterm paper that professors "kindly" schedule to be due before break, or B) during break itself when everyone is out of town (including sometimes me).

Pinzon Sateen Sheets

Okay, to be fair, this is not exactly a bad thing. Well, most years. There was that one year when I turned 21... on Thanksgiving day. A raucous party it was not. Then again, I was a Pitt commuter and a little lean on the college friends... Still you get my point... not the best time for partying. The solution to this dilemma is, of course, to capitalize on the inconvenience, rather than wallow in it, by declaring and encouraging belated birthday amnesty. All friends are welcome and invited to celebrate during the week following Thanksgiving break.

My parents, on the other hand, got in on the act beforehand. Not wanting to drag my gifts up to the trailer over the holiday (my birthday fell this year on the day after Thanksgiving), and also adhering to the grand family tradition of doing a nice dinner out for each of our three birthdays among the immediate family, Neilbert and Saundra took me out to the Grand Concourse the preceding Saturday—and rather appropriately for the early bird special.

Henckels Steak Knives

I have blogged about the Grand Concourse early bird special before, so I won't go into depth, but rather will say that their grilled sirloin, complete with wad-o-gorgonzola, is my new favorite steak. Gifts included an assortment of "what-nots" (Saundra's terminology) from curling irons to toothbrushes, and a few choice selections from my Amazon Wish list. No Lenox Tuscany, alas (like most wise people, Neilbert and Saundra realize I have too much of it already), but this birthday did finally fulfill one long-standing registry item, my Henkels stainless steel steak knife set. I've been using my 4-for-a-dollar, plastic-handle steak knives all this time, and so I was glad finally to get a set of steak knives worthy of my Cambridge Chop flatware... You realize, of course, when I say they're stainless steel, I mean that the handles are stainless steel? Even the dollar store knives come with stainless steel blades. Also among my wish list gifts was a Pinzon sateen sheet set. I have recently discovered the joys of sateen sheets, as they offer all the softness of satin sheets without the slippery-ness and skeezy bachelor pad charm. Pinzon, if you don't already know, is the Amazon brand of housewares, and in most cases a great way to get a good deal on quality merchandise. The sateen sheets are no exception.

Smooth at Madigans Babysitters, beware!

From there we headed north for Thanksgiving at the trailer. Notable attendees included Neilbert, Saundra, Grandma, Donbert and, well, me... and that's it. Exhaustive list. This fact did not stop Grandma from making two kinds of stuffing, potatoes and squash to accompany our turkey. Not to mention bringing a can of cranberry sauce and making two pies for dessert. This is all well and good, except that forty percent of us are on a low carb diet. I made a big tureen of mashed cauliflower for me and Saundra, and I cheated a bit by having stuffing and cranberry sauce (since I am one of the few people in the world who actually quite like cranberry sauce). I also had a small piece of pumpkin pie, an event which happens roughly ever other year. Pumpkin pie always sounds like such a good idea, but I always forget that I hate it until I have a bite. It's nothing to do with grandma's recipe, I assure you, because I've tried and feel the same about other pumpkin pies.

2 Guys Drinking Beer

The next day was my real birthday, and since we were at the trailer, I decided it would only be fitting to throw a party. We invited the whole family over to the trailer for drinks, hors d'oeurves and... pizza and wings. Yes, folks, pizza and wings. According to Neilbert and Saundra, this is the only way to get the Bert Brothers and their respective clans to show up for a party. On the more gourmet side of things I made bacon-wrapped dates and ice cream cake with a toasted almond crust—low carb restrictions or no, I have ceased to pretend or apologize over the fact that I despise cake. After dinner, my dearest cousin Smooth took me out to Ellicottville for a little bar-hopping. He's a trooper, that Smooth, a dedicated cousin who took me out despite the fact that Ellicottville—as I likely should have surmised—is not an especially hopping place before ski season. The hoppin'-est bar was Madigan's. It was their 25th anniversary celebration and their ads promised 1981 throwback prices. Did a can of Labatts and a whiskey & diet run $6.50 back in 1981? While I don't have concrete proof otherwise, I suspect we missed out on the discount. There was a DJ and some dancing, but the music was country-ish rock and the dancers were... well... many years our senior.

3 Guys Drinking Beer?

When we ran into Smooth's childhood babysitter in an advanced stage of drunkenness, it galvanized our resolve to move on to a different bar. From there we ended up at the Double Diamond. It was significantly less crowded, and absent a DJ boasted live entertainment in the form of a band called 2 Guys Drinking Beer. They sang mostly covers, nothing to object to, certainly, but they produced rather a conundrum. As it turned out, 2 Guys Drinking Beer was in fact comprised of three guys. Was this a case of one guy being a teetotaler? Or perhaps upon adding the third guy, they did not want to risk the damage a name change can do to an established band name? The conundrum persists.

Keep an eye out for further birthday fun, wherein I return from Pittsburgh and use my birthday as blackmail to guilt Sabrina into going to a dance club and... lo and behold, my extended birthday festivities nearly overlap with Neilbert's.

Depending on how you look at it, Wednesday is either the best or the worst day of the week for Halloween to fall. On the one hand, it's right smack in the middle of the work week. On the other hand, it provides the perfect excuse to party in costume two weekends in a row.

Mystery, the world's greatest pick-up artist and my date for the Evaline Halloween party

For my first weekend of Halloweening this year, I accompanied Mystery, the world's greatest pickup artist (well, okay, a reasonable Halloween-inspired facsimile thereof) and a conglomeration of his closest friends and roommates to the Evaline Halloween party. What is the Evaline Halloween party, you ask? Well, I trusted Mystery enough not to ask, but as it turns out, the Evaline Halloween party is an annual event hosted at the home of an indeterminate benefactor on Evaline Street in Bloomfield. It is open to the public for a $20 cover charge—at first this sounds expensive, but it's actually quite a good deal. Not only does the party provide a DJ, live bands, creative themed-décor... but also free booze! That's right, folks, free booze. It makes sense, after all. The indeterminate benefactor isn't going to tangle with the PLCB to get a liquor license for one night a year.

The "real" Jeanette from Vampire: The Masquerade

We met up at Mystery's house ahead of time to put the finishing touches on our costumes before heading out to Evaline. While I was excited to be dressing up for Halloween for the first time since I got too old to trick-or-treat, I'm also poor, and so wanted to pull from my existing wardrobe as much as possible in constructing my costume. The most obvious costume suggested by my closet was Catholic school girl. Oddly enough, this is not due to the fact that I once actually was a Catholic school girl—all of my high school uniform components reside at Neilbert's and Saundra's house, none of them especially stylish. Rather, my current wardrobe volunteered a plaid and pleated mini-skirt, upon which I once squandered $29.99 on whim at a mall shop. Beyond that, white button-down shirts, loafers and knee socks are not hard to come by. Mystery, however, was not impressed. In effort to enliven the Halloween spirit in my costume he suggested that I tweak my outfit from plain ol' boring school girl into vampire school girl Jeanette from the comic/video game, Vampire: The Masquerade (who knew Mystery was a video game aficionado in his off hours from being a master pick-up artist?).

My rendition of Jeanette from Vampire: The Masquerade

Since I already owned knee-high platform boots and fishnet stockings, I gladly agreed. Other than that, it was just a matter of getting some makeup to make me look pasty and vampiric. Despite our failed experience with false fangs and green putty, I'd say the make-up was a success. This experience, however, while fun for an evening or two, only reinforces the resolve that inspires me to eschew eye make-up on a daily basis. I think there may still a shadow of eyeliner on my lids—which, I guess, is not a problem if you wear it every day. Luckily, I was not alone, as Mystery's costume also required that he wear eyeliner. Fully bedecked in our Halloween finest, we headed out to the party, picking up a few friends on the way. We were a creative and diversely costumed crowd including not just Jeanette and Mystery, but a panda, a priest and nun couple, an in-drag yinzer cheerleader, a dancing robot and the far-and-away best of three Rainbow Brites at the party that night.

Outside at Evaline

It was drizzling a little when we arrived at the party, much of which was in the back yard of the aforementioned house. Luckily much of it was also covered in a rented tent. The bar area outside offered drafts of beer, as well as shots from a carousel of upside down liquor bottles. The bar servers recommended going to the inside bar for mixed drinks, but after exploring the house fully, we could not locate the bar. Never fear, Rainbow Brite and I did manage instead to locate a concrete-esque bunker (the Evaline theme this year was WWII) offering fruity punch and bottles of vodka. I skipped the punch and went straight for the vodka, while Rainbow Brite opted for a generous serving of both—as a result we both ended up drunker than we'd intended to that night. Inside, the house was fully outfitted for the party on WWII theme, bringing me to wonder if anyone actually lives there during the rest of the year.

Mystery picked up quite an assortment of women that night

The basement had live music and the first floor had a DJ with two rooms cleared entirely for dancing. Upstairs were rooms with tables and chairs made up to look alternatively like a war strategy room and a 40's dive bar. The attic was a dark room with walls covered in glow-in-the-dark stars under black lights. Outside, there was also purportedly a homemade roller coaster ("purportedly" because I didn't go near the thing and it was not in plain view) and a "sideways room" which I do not recommend visiting in platform heels. I, perhaps predictably, spent most of my time on the dance floor, sometimes with Mystery and sometimes without (hey, I challenge you not to dance in whatever circumstances you find yourself when "Sexyback" comes on).

After a night of raucous debauchery at Evaline, I shelved my Jeanette costume for a few days. It was tempting to get in on some of the Halloween festivities in and around the city that week, but the practicalities of early-rising workdays kept me from shimmying back into the Jeanette outfit until the following Saturday. The second weekend of Halloween brought a combination birthday/costume party from upper echelons of Wilkinsburg high society... in other words, Sabrina threw a party for Ted.

The sombrero, the cupcake, and the painted-on goatee

Unfortunately most of the guests seemed to be suffering from Halloween fatigue, as only Sabrina, Ted, Mystery and I showed up in costume. Nevertheless, it was a soiree to remember. Ted dressed up as a ruthless but stylish bandito; Sabrina dressed up as Ted, complete with curly hair, painted-on goatee and fictional, pretentious indie band T-shirt. There was buffalo crab dip, an array of Mexican dips for tortilla chips (in effort to calm the cravings of all those who beheld Ted' sombrero), an assortment of cupcakes from Dozen in Squirrel Hill, many varieties of beer including Augustiner and a Victory sampler, as well as a 1.75 liter of Old Crow Bourbon—which may or may not be the best cheap bourbon at the PA liquor stores. We have yet to test this hypothesis by pitting it head-to-head against my personal favorite cheap bourbon, Heaven Hill. The highlight of the evening (so judged because it was the only thing I deigned to take pictures of) was when Sabrina attempted to stuff thirty-eight candles into one Dozen cupcake. The cupcake was pulverized, but undoubtedly all of Ted's birthday wishes came true. Perhaps one of them was for Sabrina to wash off the goatee before bed.

A couple weeks ago my grandmother came to Pittsburgh for a visit. She was only here one day and one night and she came with one request—to go wig-shopping.

Luckily for grandma, her Pittsburgh granddaughter inherited the baby-fine hair of the Bert-family and not the luxurious lioness manes of the Kane sisters (yet, somehow also got the lioness unruliness along with the thinness... sigh). I've blogged before about my fake ponytail, and since making that purchase I've been anxious to get back to the wig shop before winter—I figure wigs are the most stylish alternative to winter stocking caps a gal can muster. And thus, I knew just the places to take grandma on her wig-shopping spree.

A selection of shoes from My Lady Boutique

Before the wig-shopping, however, and even before grandma arrived in town (chauffeured by Donbert), I headed downtown to do some more serious shopping of the sort that would likely be too tiring for grandma. My first stop was the Rainbow. The Rainbow is a juniors/urban/club-duds kind of store that can be found only in places where people don't normally shop. So far, I've seen them downtown, at the South Side strip mall (not the South Side Works—people actually shop there), and in heart of East Liberty. At the downtown one, they make you leave all of your bags, except your purse, up front while you shop. Kind of a coat-check for potential shop-lifting. This always makes me a tad nervous when I first show up, especially because this time around I had to leave my laptop. But once I'm shopping, I find that it's actually quite a relief to be unburdened by my extra baggage. I went into the Rainbow that day looking specifically for small purses to take clubbing—I've put something of a moratorium on clothes buying since I'm poor and already have so many—but didn't find any, and so continued on to the My Lady Boutique. It should be noted at this juncture that the My Lady Boutique actually offers two locations downtown, though, oddly within about a block of each other. The first and original My Lady Boutique is on Fifth just down from Wood Street, the second My Lady Boutique is on Fifth about halfway between Wood and Smithfield. The first is predominantly clothes, but also offers some shoes. The second is predominantly shoes and accessories, but also offers some clothes. I only ever go to the second (see above stated moratorium on clothes-buying). The very best thing about the second My Lady Boutique is that they have two floors. The top floor (and the mezzanine for that matter) is entirely shoes, and everything on the top floor is $7.99 or $9.99. This leaves me positively enthralled, as this is just about the perfect price for shoes in my estimation. After trying on several pairs, I settled on two pairs of blue sandals, one pair strappy with kitten heels and one more casual with chunky heels, and decided to buy yet another pair of The Best Sandals Ever.

The Best Sandals Ever

I originally bought a pair of The Best Sandals Ever in red earlier in the year, and after a short breaking in period (no womens' sandals that are $9.99 will let you get away without a few blisters the first few wears) they have proven themselves to be simultaneously the most comfortable and most stylish platforms in my collection. I wear them everywhere, to work, to the club, to Jennifer's bridal shower... they go with any outfit and I always get tons of compliments on them, including from random people on the street. So when I saw that My Lady Boutique still had the sandals, I decided to buy a pair in black. With that, I went downstairs to check out, and the cashier informed me that the sandals were Buy One Get One Half Off. I marched back upstairs and found a pair of strappy, high-heeled red sandals that I'd had my eye on. I didn't originally choose them because they're terribly impractical and I'll probably never wear them, but I got four pairs of shoes for $27 bucks, so I'm not complaining.

From there, it was up to Macy's. First stop—the Clinique counter. In general, I'm a drugstore cosmetics kind of girl... that is, what few cosmetics I wear. The extent of my make-up is Cover Girl Fresh Look pressed powder, the cheap, clear, flavorless vitamin-E lip gloss and Wet N' Wild lip pencil in willow, which is precisely one shade darker than my actual lips.

City Block and T-Zone gel, posing with my free gift

But there are two items I will buy from the Clinique counter. The first is Clinique's T-Zone control gel, which I discovered after Neutrogena stopped making their Pore-refining Mattifier. The Clinique version works just as well and has salycilic acid to aid in the fight against acne. The other item I buy from Clinique is their SPF 25 City Block sunscreen. Now that I'm in my late twenties, and thus getting older for real, daily sunscreen wear is a must, and the City Block is perfect. It's oil free, won't clog pores (I can attest that I don't break out any more often using the City Block than I did before) and it has a slight tint. Not enough that you have to worry about matching it to your skin or looking like you have a terra cotta tan, but just enough to help even out skin tone. I've never liked wearing foundation makeup, and so this slight tint is just enough to make my skin look just a little bit better without anyone really being able to tell why. While I wasn't exactly getting low on either the T-Zone gel or the City Block, I noticed in the paper that Clinique was running a free gift with purchase offer, so I decided to stock up on my two staples and cash in on the freebies.

From there I went to the Macy's bakery and grabbed a thumbprint and decaf coffee while I waited for Neilbert and grandma to get into town. We met on Wood Street on the corner just down from Eastern Wigs on Fifth. Dedicated readers may recall my previous visit to Eastern Wigs wherein I bought a fake ponytail. It seemed naturally like the best place to start. Just as a heads-up for anyone who might decide to drop in to Eastern Wigs—sales ladies at Eastern Wigs are the hard sell type. The last time I was there the lady complimented my hideously boring dollar store sandals. Moments after stepping in the door, the lady had a wig on grandma's head. To be fair, it was a great wig... as grandma wigs go. All the wigs grandma tried on that day looked basically like her usual wigs. The wig from Eastern Wigs, though, was noticeably more natural looking, boasting a variety of warm highlights and overall looking much softer than the wig grandma had walked in with. Furthermore, the wig was about $60, which constitutes a substantial savings for grandma who normally has to order them through her hairdresser at a cost of over $100. After purchasing her Eastern wig, grandma, Neilbert and I continued around the corner, down Wood Street, and up Forbes Avenue to Penn Wigs & Fashions, another downtown wig shop. In this one, the lady brought out a variety of wigs that also looked almost exactly the same as every wig my grandma wears, but they just weren't as nice. They were all kind of monotone, no interesting highlights, and they had a more fake-ish wig look than the one grandma bought at Eastern.

My New Wig

Still, at $60 they were still a deal and so grandma got one with a slightly different style of waves than her usual. As grandma tried on the bevy of look-a-like wigs, I browsed... and was delighted to find that most of their long-haired wigs were around $40. The wigs at Eastern tend to be $60+ and so I've always been reluctant to get one there. But $40 ain't bad at all. My fake ponytail was $35.

I tried on about five wigs in all. There was one with such beautiful honey and carmel colored hightlights, but it was ultimately too flat without enough movement. Next there was a very dark brown wig with long, swingy layers and auburn highlights at the tips. It made me look kinda like Xena with a modern cut and dye job. I tried on several more honey-colored wigs, many with more shape to them, but none could quite hold a candle to the prettiness of the highlights on the first wig. Ultimately, the one I liked best was a dark brown, shoulder-length with bangs and bronzy brown highlights. I wanted a wig, after all, that made me look significantly different than I do on a daily basis. And this one does... at least for most people. My Uncle Donbert, as it turned out, is already so jaded by the frequency and number of my hair color changes throughout the years that he answered the door without remark upon my return to Chez Neilbert and Saundra. My mom on the other hand claimed that she wouldn't have recognized me enough to let me in the door. Donbert gave us both a questioning look. I told him it was a wig. "Really? No..." I had to let him feel the foundation weave of the wig before he truly believed it was a wig, so I guess that bodes well for the realism factor.

And so, I ended the day with a larger shoe wardrobe, future assurance of sun protection, and the perfect wig for... er... now I just have to figure out when to wear it.

Au Bon Pain may seem to be an unlikely place for me to end up, but that constant search for wireless internet makes a gal do strange things. Well, not so strange. Despite the name ("bon pain" means "good bread" in French, and I'm still sticking to a roughly low-carb diet), Au Bon Pain is a bakery and coffee shop chain of the same ilk as Brueggers and Panera, which means they have more than just bread and they offer wireless internet.

Au Bon Pain Downtown

The other day after a particularly busy day at work, I stopped downtown on my way home to run some errands and get some internet time. After doing some banking at the National City on Wood Street, I headed up toward the downtown branch of Carnegie library on Smithfield. I could have gone to the library for wireless, but I hadn't had anything to eat yet that day (this is the second, somewhat unintentional facet of my dieting strategy—having no time to eat) and I was looking for something warm one of those first chilly days of fall. Since it was on my way to Smithfield, I stopped at the Au Bon Pain to have a look around. Set up cafeteria-style, the downtown Au Bon Pain offered a variety of serve-yourself foods, including several crocks of soup, one of which, the Harvest Pumpkin, sounded just about perfect. I was a little annoyed to find that the soups came in two sizes, Medium and Large, necessitating that I pay no less than $3.45 for soup, but to be fair the medium was generous and I wasn't hungry at the end of it. I was also pleasantly surprised at the coffee selection. In addition to my voluntary diet restrictions, I have something of a caffeine sensitivity; caffeine won't kill me, but I prefer to drink decaf whenever it's available. This poses much frustration at most coffee shops when I find myself salivating over a selection of regular coffees, like Ecuadorian bold, vanilla hazelnut or toasted almond crème brulee... only to find that all they have in decaf is "House Blend." I was particularly impressed to find that Au Bon Pain offered both a house blend and a French roast in decaf.

And so, I sat down with my coffee and soup, ready to warm up and surf the Internet. The café was pretty empty at that time of day, so I easily managed to get a table near an electrical outlet. This is a problem with most internet coffee shop sorts of places—very few have more than one or two outlets. Otherwise the soup was tasty and the French roast decaf was satisfyingly robust (just because I'm drinking decaf doesn't mean I don't want strong-tasting coffee—the more it tastes like biting right into the bean, the better). I didn't end up longer than two hours at the Au Bon Pain because I had dinner plans, but I noticed on the way out that the decal on the glass door reported their regular weekday hours to be until 7:00 pm. Early closings are a persistent problem with downtown coffee shops, and a 7:00 closing is a welcome change from the 6:00 closings of most downtown establishments that offer wireless internet.

All in all, Au Bon Pain turns out to be a great find as a downtown internet spot. The moral of this story is... well, you pick: 1) downtown coffee shops should be open later; 2) people need more reasons to be downtown past 6:00; 3) downtown bars need to start offering wireless internet; or 4) fancy flavored decaf is an excellent daily source of anti-oxidants.